I have been a parent for 21 years now. I have parented 10 children: 3 of my own and 7 foster kids. This experience certainly doesn't make me an expert but I may have a bit more insight than the parent of a few years. So take my opinion for what it is worth. Today, I would like to talk about what I have seen to be the top 10 most important things you can do for your kids. The order I put them isn't important. Sometimes many of them would rank as #1 all at the same time. Kids go through stages and therefore so does are parenting. So here it is:
1. Pray for your kids. Yes!! This should always be a priority. I guarantee that as a parent you will make mistakes, but this is one mistake you don't want to make because many of the mistakes you make can be overcome by praying for them.
2. Don't be afraid to tell your kids "no". Be prepared to tell them "no" a lot! Children naturally want to push and test boundaries. They need to know that those boundaries are firmly established and that no matter how much they push against them they will, steadfastly, be in place.
3. Do devotions with your kids. Read the Bible to them everyday and/or teach them concepts from the scriptures and talk about it. Make sure to include prayer time in this. If your kids are old enough to do their own devotions, follow up with them to be sure they are understanding what they are reading and taking in. This is a great time to field spiritual questions that will arise.
4. Have your kids pick up after themselves. This is incredibly challenging and requires large amounts of patience but if you do not teach them how to pick up after themselves they will never learn unless they have a personality naturally disposed to this. Hahaha--good luck with that! If you have a rule for your kids to clear their dishes before they leave the table....follow up on that. Maybe they are already in the living room and you are right there next to the table....it would be so easy to just take their plate to the sink or dishwasher for them. But!....if you do this you are not teaching them. Call them back to the kitchen and have them do it themselves. You will be happy you did in the long run...trust me...I have done it both ways.
5. Pick a form of discipline and stick to it. Spanking is Biblical. Won't go into that right now but if you want to look it up....look it up with the word "rod". No matter what way you have chosen you must be consistent with that method and do not relent! When they break the rule follow up 100% of the time with the chosen mode of discipline.
6. Talk to your kids. Ask them questions. Find out where their hearts are....and what is going on in their heads. Give them counsel and direction. Though they may balk at your counsel...it is forever in their head and they will hear it even when you are not around.
7. Watch what they are taking in very carefully. I am talking TV, movies and MUSIC!!! Can you tell that I feel strongly about the music thing....Do you know that Satan/Lucifer was the angel of music before he fell from his angelic position. In my opinion it is the number #1 way he uses to pull our kids away from Christ. I don't allow secular music in my home or car. So far my 21 year old only listens to Christian music....he can't stand secular music. TV and movies are a little less important but only a little. Philosophies of the world are rampant and are being pushed on children in a very strategic fashion....pay attention!
8. Watch their friendships carefully. Friends have as much impact on them as we do as parents... if not more. You can't choose their friends but if you have a good working relationship with your kids you can guide their friendships. Teach them discernment and wisdom so that they will learn when a friendship is unhealthy.
9. Watch what your kids eat. The Bible says that our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit. We should take care of those temples to a certain extent and teach our children how to do so. If you pay attention you may see a relationship between what they eat and how they behave. This is setting your kids up to succeed.
10. Last but definitely not least.....LOVE (Agape) your kids. The toughest thing to do. This goes way beyond the emotional attachment we have with our kids to the self sacrificial call of Christ. I think that the above nine are examples of this kind of love.
